First, take a Parisian. Add car of generous proportions and place in, say, the Latin Quarter, at eight o’clock at night.
It is still daylight so spotting a space, particularly with the experienced eyes of two additional Parisians on board, shouldn’t be too hard…
As non-Parisian friends on holiday, remember to help the driver with constant comments along the lines of, “There’s one over th-! no, sorry – disabled // Oh just look at how he’s parked – otherwise you could have got a Tank in… // Hey! that bugger pinched your space!”
Such encouragement is always welcome…
After an hour or so, one of the Parisians will merrily bid us farewell and go off to meet her boyfriend at a bar we have drawn unexpectedly close to. You could suggest to the others that really, it would be just as much fun to go back to the appartment, where I could rustle something up from the contents of the fridge. The co-driver will recall that the said contents amount to half a cucumber and some old teabags of the green mint kind.
Suddenly she sees an Actual Gap between two other cars, and Manoeuvres begin! It takes but five minutes of perfect directing “go on stop go on stop turn go on back stop stop no Stop!” and magnificent wheel control, to parallel-park the car - leaving four centimetres front and back between neighbourly bumpers. If Only we’d had the camera…
Yet, this feat seemed As Naught to the Parisians… They park as they drive – ignoring all obstacles.
After dinner, as they drive you round L’Arc de Triomphe de l’Etoile - the immense roundabout with its twelve exits and several million cars aiming At Yours - you must try very hard to muffle your screams.
And then be ready to spot a Parking Space vaguely in the vicinity of the appartment.
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17 comments:
My God, Dolores! Were you driving? How brave! I sincerely hope the dinner was worth it.
I have only been to Paris once...and that was on honeymoon. And more than 40 years later I still remember the scary taxi ride late in the evening from the airport to our little hotel! We walked or took the Metro thereafter.
We did go to the top of the Arc de Triomphe and took pictures of the vehicular chaos below. I still have them. It must be one hundred times worse now!
HELL NO Expat! I only like driving if there are No Cars at all on the horizon! 'Twas our Parisian friends.
Yep - the Arc de Triomphe is Frenzied - we saw on a recent TV programme that it's impossible to say who's to blame for a shunt, so Always, it's shared half & half.
The Périphérique is also terrifying, even looking down from a bridge.
CI, thinking of you and family after grandpa's departure (Mobile Madness)...
I left a message on your mobile, too, CI.
Oooh Dolores - I'm so jealous that you've been to Paris recently! I adored the city in my younger days, and had lots of adventures there. It's ages since I last visited - and from your description it seems that the only way to park in Paris is to buy a parked car!
Thanks for your messages!
What a brilliant idea, CI!
Or you could of course, plump for making your way round from one Bicycle Rank to another on the recent Borrow system.
The bikes look a bit grey & military, but jolly handy, specially if you can do the Parisian "Pfff!" as you ignore a red light & cut off a Mercedes.
We gave up our car 2 month after moving in Paris...
Fantastic, lili b of 130 Cartons! Unnecessary Car is yet another attraction of Paris.
And what about London - do you need one there? How do drivers compare?
I don't mind driving in Paris (just like London in the Good Old Days before Trafalgar Sq and Oxford St were closed off...but the parking!
No, it's public transport and Shank's Pony for me in the City of Lights and doggie poop.
Yes Jon - we can be heard across the city with my constant yelling of, "Crotte Alert! Crotte Alert!"
Many a shoe has been reprieved...
Here's a little poem by Robert Lauher:
The rush-hour traffic I'd just as soon miss
When caraftercarismovinglikethis.
And here's one by Pam Ayres:
Driving in London's my pleasure
I prize it above any other,
One hand on the wheel
The fingers like steel
And the A-Z clenched
In the other.
:-)
Thankee CI. Love Pam Ayres's - it so neatly captures The Terror.
Hi Dolores,
Scary stuff, all this driving.
I was in London a few weeks ago, talk about minging drivers.
This was pure, uncut Apocalypse now: The Horror, The Horror.
Yes, JW10, all they do is ming, ming, ming.
I'd really like to see Apocalypse Now, since I fell in love with Martin Sheen in 'West Wing'. I may have to avert my eyes from time to time...
5th October - HAPPY BIRTHDAY DOLORES!!!!
:-)
Oh CI, Thank you!! - How Exceeding Kind, and what a delightful surprise!
I didn't come on the PC yesterday because we were out lunching and shopping for Jeans and gorgeous Cinderella Shoes.
We had a wonderful day, and I'm Very Beautiful!
Thanks again
xxx
Great! And you are right. Even your avatar is glowing!
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